


Hold onto Me

by Fanwriter9101



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Cancer, M/M, Sick Character, Sickfic, Vomiting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-11
Updated: 2018-07-31
Packaged: 2019-04-21 14:54:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14287341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fanwriter9101/pseuds/Fanwriter9101
Summary: What will Yuuri Katsuki do when the love of his life is diagnosed with cancer will he be able to be strong for the both of them?





	1. Chapter 1

This wasn't supposed to happen. They were going to skate together, get married, live long and happy lives. His fiancé kept saying they could still do everything they planned. Yuuri had just nodded and hoped that this was just a terrible dream.

When Viktor first came to Hasetsu Yuuri thought it was dream, a wonderful dream. As time went on and Viktor began coaching him, he soon began falling in love with him. Towards the end of their first season Yuuri got Viktor and himself matching wedding bands, although that wasn't what he meant. They soon got engaged and even though Yuuri wanted to get gold Viktor loved him and was still proud.

The two returned to Japan to enjoy some time to themselves before having to go back and train. For the first few weeks everything was wonderful. Yuuri and Viktor spent every waking moment together. They took long walks on the beach, enjoyed pork culet bowls, and all the things in between.

As the summer was drawing to a close Viktor decided it was time to get Yuuri back on the ice for the upcoming season. They hadn't even begun planning their wedding, Yuuri wanted to win gold first. Viktor knew there was no stopping his fiancée once he set his mind on something.

Everything soon came crashing down. The ice skating season started off great Yuuri was making his way up the ranks and Viktor couldn't be more proud.

He thought at first maybe it was all the traveling they had been doing Viktor wasn't feeling well following them landing in London. Yuuri wanted to go sit seeing but all Viktor wanted to do was go to sleep. Luckily Yuuri could tell something wasn't right and they made their way to the hotel room. Yurio had texted Viktor asking to come out to dinner with him and Otabek, he politely declined.

"I hope you aren't getting sick." Yuuri said to Viktor as he unlocked the hotel door. Viktor didn't say a word. He was becoming lightheaded and could feel his joints ache. Viktor didn't even bother undressing before lying on the bed, his face holding onto the pillow.

"Yuuri..." He panted out feeling like he was being suffocated. Viktor had been sick multiple times growing up but never had he felt so awful than in that moment.

"Viktor", Yuuri kneeled down next to him, he could see Viktor was crying. "Talk to me love, what's wrong."

"I feel terrible, my joints ache, I'm dizzy, and I don't know what's wrong with me."

"You might just be jet lagged." Yuuri could only hope. He helped Viktor get undressed and slipped him into his night clothes. Yuuri climbed into bed and hoped that Viktor would hopefully feel better in the morning.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning when Yuuri woke up, Viktor was still sound asleep next to him, he figured he would get up and get ready. Viktor would join him later for now he needed to sleep.

Yuuri went downstairs for breakfast and ran into Phichit.

"Hey Yuuri!" Phichit called over, Yuuri was in his own thoughts that he didn't even hear his friend call him. Phichit made his way over to his friend and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Oh hey Phichit, sorry sort of lost in my thoughts."

"That's okay, mind if I join you?"

"No not at all." Phichit sat down across from Yuuri.

"So where is Viktor?"

Yuuri's heart stopped, he began thinking about Viktor and hoping he was okay. "Oh, he is upstairs; I think he is jet lagged." Yuuri laughed and hoped that's all it was.

Phichit and Yuuri had breakfast and then headed over to the rink to get ready for the day. After warm ups Viktor still hadn't arrived. Yuuri called Viktor and there was no reply. Yuuri's heart stopped. This wasn't like Viktor.

"Hey Pig! Where is Viktor?" Yurio. Yuuri was too upset to face him.

"Oh, hey Yurio."

"Well aren't you going to reply to me?"

Yuuri didn't want to; well it wasn't that he didn't want to. He just didn't have an answer. "I'm not sure."

"What do you mean you aren't sure?" Yurio didn't seem mad, he was confused.

"I mean he might be sick or jet lagged. He was asleep this morning and I thought he would meet up with me. But he isn't answering his phone." Yuuri explained, as he kept talking his heart kept pounding and he contuied to fight the urge to cry in front of Yurio.

"I'll go get Yakov; he'll get to the bottom of this." Yurio quickly ran off before Yuuri had a chance to thank him, he could only hope Yurio was right.

"Hey Yakov!" Yurio found Yakov talking to Mila.

"Yura, what is it?"

"Something is wrong with Viktor can you go over to the hotel and check on him?"

Little did Yakov know what he was about to find. Yakov agreed and got the hotel key from Yuuri, Phichit did his best to calm Yuuri down before the start of the competition. Nothing worked. Yuuri was going to have to skate without Viktor there, and he could only hope the love of his life was okay.


	3. Chapter 3

Yakov made his way to the hotel room, he knocked once. No answer. He inserted the key into the door and made his way in. The bathroom light was on; the sight Yakov saw broke his heart. He knelt down to his former skater. Viktor was on the floor next to a pile of vomit. He was pale and shaking.  
“Viktor, talk to me.”  
“Hurts,” Viktor muttered.   
Meanwhile back at the competition, it was almost time for Yuuri to go on. All of his friends were extremely supportive, even Yurio. Yuuri’s program went off without a problem. In the end, Yuuri busted into tears. Only wishing Viktor could have seen. As soon as he got off the ice, Mila and Yurio were running over to him. Their faces had sad expressions.  
“Yuuri, it’s Viktor…” Yakov had Viktor rushed to the hospital not knowing what was going on. Yuuri jumped out of the car nearly tripping over his own feet. He ran to the hospital doors and to the front counter. Tears falling down his face, the nurse pointed to the waiting room. Yakov was sitting in one of the seats. Yuuri kept crying, it was like a stream and there was no dam to stop his overflowing emotions. Yuuri felt like it was an eternity before finally, someone came out to give some news on Viktor. By that time every skater was in the waiting room.   
“May I speak to Yuuri Katsuki?” Yuuri stood up. His heart began pounding again.  
The doctor and Yuuri walked into the hallway, away from everyone.  
“Mr. Katsuki, we ran multiple tests on your finance, and well I’m sorry to say but he has Leukemia.” Yuuri’s world crashed down around him. Everything the doctor said afterward was all a blur. Yuuri just wanted to see Viktor. He wanted to wake up. He thought this was a nightmare.  
The doctor took Yuuri back to see Viktor. He had an iv hooked up to his arm. He was pale and sound asleep. Yuuri sat down on the bed next to him and held his hand. As soon as the doctor left. Yuuri began crying again.   
The word cancer kept circling his brain. How did Viktor get cancer? Yuuri kept asking himself over and over again. According to the doctor, it wasn’t anything that Yuuri or Viktor did wrong, it just happened.   
Viktor was discharged from the hospital a few days later. Yuuri didn’t compete the second day. No one knew why until Viktor and Yuuri made a courageous post on their social media. Naturally, Yuuri stepped away from skating to focus on Viktor. The two flew back to Japan. The flight was quiet, besides the times Viktor got terribly ill, his body was getting weaker. He gaged at the sound of running water.   
When they landed, Minako picked them up. Yuuri could tell that she had been crying. Viktor didn’t say a word home. He kept his head against the glass. Yuuri’s mom welcomed them home and offered food. Viktor declined and went straight to bed. Makkachin could tell something was wrong with her owner and let out a soft whimper.


	4. Chapter 4

In the days following Viktor’s diagnoses, Yuuri was doing everything to help Viktor. All he wanted to do was sleep. The doctor from London called, asking if Viktor had started chemo luckily they caught cancer early. If Viktor didn’t get the treatment he needed he would lose his fight. Yuuri almost wanted to tell the doctor that Viktor hadn’t even begun fighting. Instead, Yuuri just thanked the doctor and hung up. He knew he needed to get Viktor to a hospital and start treatment.  
“Viktor,” Yuuri knocked on the door and heard a muffled answer. These days Viktor just kept himself shut in his room. He wasn’t eating as much but in Viktor’s mind, he was eating enough to not make himself sick.  
“Oh, Yuuri, do you need something?” Yuuri’s heart broke, they were engaged and yet Viktor was talking to him as if they were just friends.  
“I wanted to talk to you about treatment; you’ll die if you don’t.”  
“Yuuri, I’m already so weak and tired the treatment will just make it worse.” Viktor hadn’t looked at Yuuri he just laid in bed the covers up to his head.   
“Viktor I don’t want to lose you! If you get this treatment then there is a chance you will live. I want to go back to skating; I want to marry you Viktor. Why can’t you see I’m trying to save you?” Yuuri was starting to get emotional. What was it going to take?   
“Alright,” Viktor replied simply.   
Yuuri set up Viktor’s chemo appointments. A few days later Viktor started receiving treatment. He got chemo twice a week and took six different types of medication. The first night after getting chemo was the worst night of Yuuri’s life.   
Even during the treatment, Viktor’s body rebelled. A nurse said it was completely normal for Viktor to get sick but the poor man had nothing left in his body. When they returned home from the hospital Viktor spent the night near a trashcan he was shaking under the covers, and Yuuri was doing everything he could to help the love of his life. 

After a couple of rounds of chemo Viktor began losing his hair. It happened when he was taking a shower. He was drying his hair off when a clump came off and was on the towel. Viktor began crying softly. He sat down on the bathroom floor and felt weak and tired. After a while Yuuri began to worry he knocked on the door but didn’t hear a reply so he let himself in. Viktor wasn’t dressed he was just sitting on the bathroom floor.   
“Oh Vitya, what’s wrong?” Yuuri knelt down and then saw. Viktor shaved his head that night in the following days Viktor broke his silence and posted on his social media. An out pouring of love and support came in and Viktor cried.   
When Viktor’s chemo was finally done he was supposed to be in remission but the doctors saw that he still had cancer cells. They prescribed him more medicine and new treatment. The new treatment cause Viktor to get more bruising and he was tired all the time.  
One night after a day of treatment Viktor and Yuuri were in the bathroom Viktor had just finished throwing up for what felt like the millionth time that day. They were both sitting not saying anything, until Viktor spoke up.   
“Yuuri… I can’t do this anymore.”   
Yuuri, who had been looking down at his feet immediately looked up at his fiancé. “Viktor what do you mean?”   
“I don’t want to do the treatment anymore, I want to live my life without hospitals and doctors. I want you to go back to skating I want us to get married and live our lives as if tomorrow is our last.   
Yuuri started crying, “Viktor… you’ll die.   
“At least I’ll die feeling like myself.”


	5. Chapter 5

The next day they went to the hospital, the doctor said they weren’t sure how long Viktor would live if he stopped the treatment. Viktor was fine with it, Yuuri wasn’t sure how he felt about it.   
The following month Yuuri and Viktor got married. It was a very small ceremony at the hot springs. Yuuri’s family was there of course and their skating friends as well. For their honeymoon the newlyweds stayed at the hot spring they didn’t need to go anywhere fancy.   
As far as Yuuri’s skating career he wasn’t ready to go back, he wasn’t ready for the media and that was fine by Viktor.   
Another month went by and Viktor was doing better, sure he was tired and weak but he felt more like himself. Yurio invited Viktor and Yuuri to spend some time with him and Otabek. Yuuri agreed but as long as they came to Japan, Viktor didn’t want to upset his husband so he agreed.   
The four had a great time visiting Tokyo if only it could last.   
When Yuuri and Viktor had gotten home that night Yuuri could tell something wasn’t right.   
“Viktor are you okay?” Yuuri asked seeing how pale his husband was.   
“Yes, just a little tired, nothing to worry about.” Yuuri placed his hand on Viktor’s forehead.  
“You’re really warm Viktor, are you sure you don’t need to go the hospital.” Yuuri was beginning to get anxious.   
“No, Yuuri I’m fine I just need to sleep.” Viktor got up and went into the bathroom closing the door behind him. Yuuri got dressed and slipped into bed. After a few minutes, Yuuri called for Viktor.   
“Vitya are you coming to bed?”   
“In a minute,” Viktor replied sounding tired.   
A minute turned into two then five. Yuuri’s anxiety was getting the better of him he jumped out bed and ran into the bathroom. Viktor’s nose was bleeding and there was blood in the sink.   
“Oh god, Viktor!” Yuuri ran and called for an ambulance. Viktor was calm but he couldn’t say the same for his husband.   
When they arrived at the hospital the doctor told them the only thing they could do was make Viktor comfortable he had lived past their expectations. Yuuri cried, Viktor cried because Yuuri was crying. He knew he was dying he was okay with it but, he wasn’t okay with leaving Yuuri. 

The days passed and Viktor only got worse, he was in pain and couldn’t keep anything down. Yuuri didn’t know what to do. He wanted to make the pain go away and get his Viktor back.   
One rainy afternoon Yuuri was making himself lunch when he heard something fall to the ground. Yuuri ran into the bedroom to see Viktor laying on the floor completely lifeless.  
“Oh no Viktor please no!” Yuuri began sobbing as he cried for his parents. By the time the ambulance arrived Viktor was barely breathing. There wasn’t much anyone could do, Viktor was lifeless on the hospital bed.  
“Yuuri, what do you want to do?” Yuuri’s mom asked as they stood in the doorway looking at Viktor.  
“I don’t know mom.” Tears began falling down his face.   
Yuuri laid with Viktor for the last time that night. He passed quietly as the two laid sleeping side by side.   
In the days following Viktor’s death, the ice skating world would never be the same. The world stopped and mourned for the death of beloved Russian skater Viktor Nikiforov. Yuuri had never cried so much in his entire life. No one knew what to say or what to do.   
After Viktor was buried in Russia Yuuri returned home. He didn’t know if he would ever skate again.   
A year went by and Yuuri began trying to get back onto the ice. It’s what Viktor would have wanted. While he could almost hear Viktor saying move on and find someone else Yuuri never did fall in love. He never remarried, never had any kids. When he retired after an amazing comeback he started coaching rising ice skaters.   
One day a small little boy came stumbling in. Yuuri had never met anyone shyer than this little one. When Yuuri asked what his name was he timidly said,  
“Viktor”.


End file.
